A Bloke’s Guide to Impressing the Missus: Dining at the Sunborn Yacht Hotel, Gibraltar
Alright, lads, let me set the scene. You might be reading this in a clueless panic before Valentine’s has descended upon us, or you might just be looking for a cheeky getaway from the UK. Either way, you want to pull out all the stops for the missus—something that says, "I’ve thought this through," because Weatherspoons in Feb ain’t gonna cut the mustard.
Ever considered whisking her off to Gibraltar? Just a couple of hours' flight from the UK, this rocky slice of the Med serves up a banging atmosphere and epic views.
Why Gibraltar? First, you’ve got the iconic Rock itself. Climb it, cable car it, or just stand there with a pint and admire it—whatever floats your boat. Then there are the cheeky Barbary macaques. They're worth a laugh (just don’t let them nick your sunglasses). You’ve also got duty-free shopping, decent beaches, and enough history to make you look cultured. Plus, everyone speaks English, so no awkward pointing at menus or guessing what you’ve ordered.
But the best bit? A night at the Sunborn Yacht Hotel. This floating palace moored in the marina is your golden ticket to impressing the missus. The dining experience alone will have you both feeling like royalty.
Those lucky enough to make it over from Loaded kicked things off at the Sky Restaurant, perched at the top of the yacht. The vibe is spot on—classy but not stuffy, with views of the marina that’ll have her swooning and thanking you for being such a genius.
Starter time. Try the Seared Scallops—fat, juicy little beauties served with pea purée and crispy pancetta. Perfectly cooked, and let’s be honest, anything with pancetta is a winner. The Beef Carpaccio, drizzled with truffle oil and topped with rocket and Parmesan is also a winner.
Now, onto the main event. The Chateaubriand for Two is insane. This is the kind of meal that makes you feel like a proper bloke—thick, juicy slices of perfectly cooked beef, carved right at the table. It comes with creamy dauphinoise potatoes, fresh veg, and a rich Béarnaise sauce. Absolute class. The Mediterranean Sea Bass might be more her plate—all light and fancy, served with saffron risotto and a caper sauce. Enough to give a carnivore food envy.
Dessert is non-negotiable. The Chocolate Fondant, which is rich, gooey, and paired with homemade vanilla ice cream is to die for. Maybe suggest the Lemon Posset for the missus—light, zingy, and comes with these buttery little biscuits you’ll definitely steal.
The service? Top-notch. The staff know their stuff and don’t make you feel like a plonker when you ask for help choosing wine. We went for a Rioja, which paired perfectly with the Chateaubriand.
When we finally rolled out of there, full and happy, we were grinning ear to ear. Job done. If you’re in Gibraltar, which honestly, is well worth the trip from the UK—this is the place to go. You’ll look like a hero, the food is next-level, and with the yacht setting, you’ve got bragging rights for weeks.