Welcome to January! The Christmas regret is in full swing, when you look in the mirror you just see an egg with a face, and you have turned over the latest in a tree’s worth of new leaves to live a healthy lifestyle, actually get to the gym and GIVE UP BOOZE. It’s Dry January. The time when every Tom, Dick, and Prince Harry lecture anyone still awake within ear shot about the evils of drink, how much weight we’ll lose if we give it up, how much our skin, sleep, sexual performance, and chance to get into heaven will improve if we just knock it on the head.
But, just as a little counterpoint… do you know what’s better than living your life in a state of total body control? DRINKING!! How else are we meant to get through January? On paper, it lasts 31 days, In reality, it feels closer to 32 years. In Siberia. On a hunger strike. So, the least we can do is have a few pints of guilt-free Guinness to get us through!
I don’t know if you’ll have read between the lines of my oh-so-subtle arguments and worked out my position, but if you haven’t – I’m not necessarily a believer in abstinence. Of any kind. However, it’s undeniable that plenty of people are giving the old truth juice a bit of a swerve nowadays, and not just in January.
According to a recent survey by the charity Alcohol Change UK, who first pioneered “Dry January” in 2014 – Almost a third (32%) of males wants to quit booze for January 2025 and 1 in 5 (21%) want to drink less than they did in 2024.
But why do people want to give up the good stuff? Well, it’s our health, see. We’re all aware of the long-term dangers of alcohol, plus the fact that decades of advertising and studies of the perils of over indulgence has had an effect. Back to the Alcohol Change UK survey, almost 1 in 3 (31%) men are worried about the long-term health effect of drinking, and they are acting on it. Everyone is attempting to cut down, and that can only be a good thing for general public health.
It's undeniable that there has been a cultural change. As a teenager of the ‘90s, alcohol has run through my life like the lettering through a stick of rock (spelling p.i.s.s.e.d probably.) From my first night out (underage, obviously – it was the ‘90s) whenever friends have got together, fun has been had, memories have been made, and laughter has been heard, it’s been accompanied by the sound of clinking glasses. But things are changing, all of my social circle drink way less than we used to. Sure, there’s an element of habit in that - we go out less, we are more comfortable in ourselves and our ability to have a good time, proper hangovers absolutely ming when you hit your 40s. But it also feels like there is less pressure to have a drink in a social setting than there was.
The stats bear this out too, Drinkaware have been monitoring the UK’s drinking habits since 2018, and in 2024 found that when people are drinking, they are drinking less units in a day than they used to, and the proportion of UK drinkers who binge drink at least once a month is the lowest it has been, looking back to 2018. And it’s the young that are just not getting their round in, with 1 in 5 not drinking at all, compared to 13% of 35–54-year-olds.
There are now plenty of social events and things to do that don’t require booze to take part, from board game cafés to cricket cages, to extreme indoor crazy golf, to football golf (but not karaoke. You’d have to be insane/actually competent to do that sober.) You can find anything that you want to do, and it doesn’t necessarily have to involve booze, and with the vast array of non-alcoholic lagers, ales, spirits, and CBD based drinks that are now available, and don’t even taste like dog piss anymore, there’s a drink for every recovering pisshead. What I would say is that anyone who feels that they are out of control, can’t handle it, or that their life will be improved by not drinking – you have my entire support. You’ve got to do what’s right for you.
For me, I guess it’s a case of, my wild days are behind me, I’ve learned moderation the hard way, the British way, by waking up with a thick head, a vague sense of having said or done something wrong, and SHAME tattooed across my forehead. But also, it was kind of a rite of passage… we’re meant to be a bit dumb when we’re young… I’m not saying that wrecking your body is a good thing, far from it, and I’m not saying I have no regrets. My regrets hardback will be coming out in the spring priced £34.99 and weighing just about enough to crush a small child. What I am saying is that booze can be a great bonder, and maybe, the key isn’t complete abstinence, but learning to stop before we have had too much. That is my January aim, not to stop the booze, but to never get to the stage where I am a dick, on the booze (again...). It’s not for everyone – but it works for me! And to everyone doing dry January – I salute you and will see you in the pub around the 18th… where you absolutely will be drinking lime and soda all night. Definitely.
