Yeah, we’re aware it’s still cold outside, but string vests are back. We know this for a fact because they’re bloody everywhere in the celebrity world. The way fashion works is: underground scenes do something (in this case, kink forward sex parties, and queer raves) then it hits alt and lesser known fashion brands (Adam Jones, who happens to upcycle beer towels into sweater-vests but also does lacier options that evoke a classic stringer) then it hits the celebrity.
The well-endowed king of vests is Barry Keoghan. He opted for a mesh one in a recent GQ cover (a confident upgrade from the standard grand-pa style cotton vest he wore in 2022 for them), he’s also wearing a pigeon, but Barry looks like he comes from a line of boxers and has the stamina to go twelve rounds even if it’s twelve rounds of deranged floor humping sex, so basically, he clearly fucks and therefore the pigeon can watch on.
Speaking of fighters, Zac Efron might look a bit like a bulked to shit kid in some fits worn on set in The Iron Claw but tell him that and he also looks like he’d be able to crush you sideways. Like you’re ten again, about to stamp on an empty can of coke, except he’s Zac Efron, body like a literal wrestler, and you’re the can of coke. Anyway yeah, he’s also wearing vests: yellow mesh ones, little grey ones too. With jorts sometimes, which you know will be paired with some loafers and white socks all summer long.
And there’s Jeremy Allen White, remember him? Biceps like the child of popeye and liver king. Remember him on Party Tricks? Vests. Also, everyone in The Sopranos, which is 25 years old now and had a resurgence in lockdown, vests. Vests, vests, vests, as the old dad joke goes: society, you’re under a vest.
Evidently then, tele and celebs are all over the vest. Being buff is also back (from the above to Gladiators). This means in six months time, your more daring mates (you know, the ones who strike a bold coloured shirt and sambas and know what blokecore and in some cases ‘taste’ is) will be slipping into them too. Just in time for summer, which is great timing, if you think about how fucking hot it is these days.
If it weren’t obvious, vests are very much IN. And that’s despite the Stella Artois connotations. Though actually, Martine Rose may have helped that too with her capsule collection collaborating with the Belgian brewery established in 1366. No vests in that collection, but there’s a t-shirt for £215 that looks a bit like ones your dad wore to clean the cars in 2005, only cooler.
How to wear a vest
If you’re alright with getting some arm out (and given everyone’s going buff-mode now, we’ll assume you are too) they're great pieces of clothing when styled right. Under a big boxy shirt with the buttons down, with trackies if you want to look like Begbie in Trainspotting, with some wide-boi carpenter pants from Carharrt so you look like a damn ranch hand in the way everyone wants to these days, Lenny? Hell, even under a two-piece suit (waistcoats as a standalone item, still not in, leave that to the magicians). It all works. Vests work.
Vests are back. Get one. Maybe get five.